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Joshua Allen's Match Preview

Ruthless Cruelty

As is my wont, I took Jessica and Mig out for a night on the town to get to know them before the big match. As Socrates or Indiana Jones or somebody once said: “To truly know a man's soul, you must feed it gin and buffalo wings until it tells you something incriminating.”

Well, last night our merry band updated that famous saying! "To truly know a man or woman's soul, you must feed it a whole tray of Popov-infused, Aspartame-rich Jell-O and then get kind of handsy and then sort of creepily intense about karaoke, shrieking stuff like C'mon guys let's all sing 'You Oughta Know' together! Guys, let's go! God dammit I'm not joking around here, you're ruining everything WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS LIKE THIS"

I tried to take notes during the evening but all I found this morning was a Post-It affixed to my Shai-Hulud* that said: "awsum idea: naked layer tennis webcam nude." So I'm trying to piece together what all we discussed. I sort of remember Jessica showing me her tattoo, which just underscores her utter devotion to fonts (she hates when I call them "fonts") and bragging about her amazing hand-lettered creations for the Village Voice, Entertainment Weekly, People, The New York Times Magazine, etc.

Mig went on at length about his interactive design work for Threadless and I had to remind him that t-shirts are inherently evil because they keep the world from seeing my luxurious chest hair, which is why I never wear anything but a leather vest. But then he showed me his portfolio and I was reminded that a) he also loves a good font ("It's a typeface, you drunk b-hole") and 2) brings out the best in his collaborators and c) is sickeningly good at what he does.

Jessica and Mig are actual real-life friends, and I asked if that would keep them from bringing the ruthless cruelty that Layer Tennis demands. They said something like: "You have an entire taco in your vest pocket. We're going home."

Anyway, this game should be a beaut. These youngsters have some serious chops. I hoist a Jell-O tray in their honor and look forward to vaguely remembering the match the next morning.


*Ladies, do you enjoy it when your man refers to his personal junk with a Dune reference? Of course you don't. But maybe you have a friend you don't like very much who'd be into it? Call me.

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Congratulations to Mig Reyes, Layer Tennis Season 3 Champion. jc-12.20

Thanks to all the players, commentators and fans who made Season Three of Layer Tennis a big success. And thanks to the crew at Goodby Silverstein & Partners and all the folks at Adobe Creative Suite for making it possible. Watch this space (or sign up for Season Tickets or follow us on Twitter) for news about some special exhibition matches being planned and about Season 4. jc-12.20

Cast your votes on The Championship Match. Both Finalists will receive invitations to play in the post-season tournament for Season Four. jc-12.17

Here's how the voting works. Decide who you'd like to declare as winner and then simply tweet their first name following a hash mark. Either #mig or #noper and, this is important, also include #lyt in that tweet. We'll leave the voting open all weekend and announce our Season Three Champion on Monday. jc-12.12

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